Over the past 3 years I seem to have lost some huge chunks
from my memory about what it entails to look after a newborn. Bust reality has
hit...and hard!
The first thing I noticed was the cramping. Pain so intense
it was like having contractions all over again. I couldn’t remember having
these with bub number one and was told that generally they only start with your
2nd. How lovely, another little present to add to the rest. They pop
up constantly all day and night but are most painful while breastfeeding. This
leads me to the next failed memory.
My last memory of breastfeeding was having the ability to
whack my son on and give him a feed as easy as pie. What I had forgotten about
was the months of work it took to get to that point. The weeks of teaching bubs
how to attach and detach without ripping nipples off, the cracks and bleeding
and milk spraying everywhere but into bubs mouth. Im dealing with an amount of
milk that would feed every child in the neighbourhood and allows my baby to lay
under it like a waterfall and lap it up like a cat. Not so great for teaching
her how to latch on.
While we are talking feeding I had totally forgotten how
long it takes to feed and how often they need to happen. Turns out that life is
now revolving around feed times. Every outing is planned for no longer than a 2
hour time frame to avoid above milk spraying sessions in public. I am once
again learning that food is still edible even if it is stone cold and eating
while feeding results in a headful of crumbs for the baby.
I have also rediscovered that whilst I have time away from
being a milk machine that time needs to be used to do washing. So much washing!
And everything is stained in poop or vomit. The noises and explosions that come
from such a small child are indescribable and the damage caused is there for
all to see and smell.
One of the most frustrating things I had forgotten about (or
possibly blocked out of my memory) is the unwanted advice and opinions. Seems
that although I managed to raise one baby I no longer have the adequate skills
or knowledge to do the same thing with the 2nd bub. My parenting
skills are now up for public dissection and everyone feels they are qualified to
offer their advice. I now must be the frazzled mum with a newborn and anything
less means I’m not doing my job correctly. If I don’t look tired enough I must
not be feeding enough during the night, if my baby is content and not crying
24/7 there must be a problem. And the
worst thing is that most of the time the people offering the advice haven’t laid
eyes on a newborn in over 20 years. Guess their memories must be a lot sharper
than mine!
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